The 3 Stages of an Online Scam: Stop Before It's Too Late!

Author: James Greening

October 1, 2021

Many people are not aware of an online scam until they fall for one. This is especially astonishing when you consider that some of the most common online scams are centuries older than the internet itself. For instance, Advance Fee Scams (more popularly known as the ‘Nigerian Prince’ scam) can be traced back to the late 18th Century and Ponzi schemes have been running rampant since the late 1800s.

While the ‘scripts’ and technology used to perpetrate scams change with the times, the scams themselves have not evolved drastically. There are three distinct stages that can be observed for most types of online scams.

While ‘online scam’ is a broad term that encompasses everything from romance scams to shopping scams, this article reveals the most common signs of one-to-one scams such as Romance Scams and Investment Scams.

Being aware of and recognizing these stages can help you avoid losing money or losing more money, depending on which stage of the scam you are in.

First Stage of a Scam: Baiting the Victim

Scammers are masters of exploiting human psychology and will try to push various buttons of the potential victim’s psyche at once in order to make them participate in the scam. They also use various communication methods available at their disposal in order to reach as many people as possible. Scammers try to bait victims using

  • Emails
  • Text Messages
  • Messaging apps such as WhatsApp, Messenger and Snapchat
  • Social media platforms such as Facebook, Instagram, Reddit and Quora
  • Dating apps and platforms such as Tinder and Bumble
  • Classifieds platforms such as Craigslist, Mercari and Facebook Marketplace

You might be being baited for a scam if you receive either of the below:

  • An email from a stranger claiming to need help in transferring funds out of their country
  • An email from a ‘lawyer’ claiming that you have inherited a fortune from a distant relative
  • An email or direct message from a stranger who wants to be your friend or get romantically involved
  • A classified ad that is too good to be true

The opening communication will urge the victim to reply as soon as possible, such as within a 48-hour window to avoid losing out on the opportunity.

Second Stage of a Scam: Gaining the Victim’s Trust (and Money)

If you respond to the scammer’s communications, they will then first create an illusion of authenticity. Professional scammers will rarely ask for money directly in the first or second communication; they first try to assure the victim that they legitimately have their best interests in mind. This could be done by:

  • Sharing fake documents to ‘prove’ their identity and affiliation to a well-known organization (such as a bank)
  • Sending pictures stolen from social media accounts of real people and claiming to be them
  • Exchanging informal messages with the victim for a few weeks, days or even months to gain trust
  • Asking for identification documents from the victim to make the process appear formal and professional

Once the victim starts believing the scammer’s lies, then comes the request for money. The scammer might ask the victim to pay them for various reasons such as:

  • Processing fees required by the bank
  • Delivery fees and customs duty required by the shipping company
  • Lawyer’s fees or other legal fees
  • Bribes to be paid to authorities
  • An advance payment for shipping a product
  • A personal expense or medical emergency
  • An incredible investment opportunity (usually cryptocurrency or forex)

Scammers are rarely content with getting just one payment with the victim. They will try to squeeze as much money out of them as possible, which usually means that they will use more than one of the excuses listed above. 

Scammers are also known to maintain ‘sucker lists’ of victims which they use to target vulnerable people repeatedly with different scams. Once the victim catches on that they are being fooled, the scammers move on to the third stage.

Third Stage of a Scam: Discarding the Victim

If the scammer realizes that they have gotten as much money as possible out of the victim and cannot extract more, they simply discard the victim and move on to new ones. You will know that you have been taken for a ride if:

  • They simply no longer reply to any of your messages
  • The person you were communicating with suddenly turns hostile by threatening and abusing you
  • They make various excuses for not paying you and keep delaying the matter
  • Repeatedly try to assure you that it is ‘not a scam’
  • They block you when you ask for your money back


Spotting a scam becomes easy if you know the patterns. If you spot any of the signs listed in this article, the best course of communication is to simply cut off all communications with the scammer. There is no benefit to confronting them or trying to expose them, as scammers know very well how to cover their tracks and avoid being caught.

If you have already fallen for a scam, read our guide ‘I've Been Scammed, What Now?

Follow us on social media to stay updated with scam alerts and real examples of scams. Join our Facebook group and Forum to report scams or for help and guidance.

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